Running, Jumping, Swiming… just get on the train mate!

Well now it’s been a while but I have returned with a new found appreciation of the sea and have fallen in love with the seafront at Hastings, love the place, love it.  But that’s another blog post, let’s have a look at…

… A few medals later and what are we left with?  A few massive buildings in east London that nobody will remember or go to and a massive bill for the tax payer all in the name of making the country look good.

What a fucking disruption, everything has properly tits up down my way due to being on the fast track line that runs through Stratford.


You’ve fucked that up mate!

It used to take just under half an hour to get to King’s Cross from Gravesend with trains running every half hour but now it takes ages because they have stopped the quarter past train so the platform is rammed fat tourists at Stratford.  The comfort of the fast bullet trains has gone downhill slightly.  It’s hard to enjoy such space and luxurious seat with just the right amount of air-con when you have an American’s armpit just above your head and a child staring you out for the most part of your journey.

And when you finally get to King’s Cross you are penned in like cattle and have to leave the station just to get on to the tube rather than go down the first escalator into the underground as normal.  I had a guy moan at me because I ducked under a rope barrier to get out of the ‘cattle run’ and told me to go back the way I came.  Good luck with that mate, I just kept on my merry way.  Some people actually looked put out that I had used my brain and skipped past the rabble, they genuinely looked pissed off that I didn’t want to follow the rules of the rope barrier, the shame.

I really don’t get what the hype is all about, all this excitement for such a childish group of events.  Some of it is quite interesting as some of the sports aren’t really highlighted in the mainstream sports media such as the judo or shooting, it’s not every day that you see a clay pigeon shooter on an Adidas advert now is it.

But the rest of it is just really childish, that whole ‘I can run faster than you can’ bullshit; I know that I grew out of that stage when I was a child and I really don’t have that much of a competitive side.  I do sometimes get all antsy when I hit the air hockey tables though and can often be heard to shout ‘BOOYAAAAAHHHH!’ from time to time in  the penny arcades on the seafront at Hastings.

Seriously, grown men and women training for four years just so they can say that they beat a bunch of other grown adults in a race or in a fight or in a boat or bike, really?  This is what is passing for entertainment for you fucking sheep, really?

and all of a sudden there are loads of people talking about sports that they haven’t even heard of before like they have been into it for years,  when that ‘Won Chan’ of china beat ‘Van Dehoot’ in the table tennis final I was glued to my seat.  Who really is into synchronised diving, who goes out of their way to get to every air rifle shooting event?  NOBODY!


But that wasn’t why I was heading to London today, what I was there for couldn’t have been so far from the extravaganza of sports nobody gives two fucks about.  I was off to the zombie fate.

It was held at a venue that used to be called Elektrowork, now Metal Works that used to host such nights as ‘sick and twisted’ and ‘Slime-light’ (I’ll post a few links at the bottom of the page) up Islington was and it was a blast, even if I did hit the cocktails a little too hard.

They had a zombie makeup workshop, dead flower arranging and a 12 hour zombie movie marathon.

It was a great evening surrounded by the recent dead and I also had deep political and religious banter with my new Muslim mate Yuss, a polite but strange guy done up with voodoo priest makeup and a penchant for Polish ciggies.  I told him I was Jewish and we got on like a house on fire but we still could not agree on Palestine ha-ha!

There were loads of the undead in there, a zombie tennis player, zombie children, a group of zombie soldiers and even a zombie Amy Winehouse.  There was a BBQ cooking up all sorts of ghoulish stuff and a guy even fried up some brains and a few eyes for the delight of the crowd, I don’t think many people actually ate the eyes though.

The movie selection was a bit of a disappointment, no ‘zombie flesh-eaters’ or any of the blind dead films which I thought was a problem.  They did show living dead at the Manchester morgue but there was absolutely no Fulci.  I got really rather drunk took a few photos and even licked a dead girls shoe… top notch entertainment.

So all in all, a great day with the undead of old London town, and all for the price of £20!

I also called a scout master a paedophile outside of St Pancras station to which one of the scouts overheard and started to laugh (nervously?) and I was harassed by a Krishna dude to buy a book and come to their café, but he was nice so I didn’t feel the need to put him in a bin.

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